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Monday, January 30, 2012

story From My Past Life 2!

this is how i feel when i was 14th!


26/FEB/2008


DEAR JOURNAL,
 
i dont know what to do?i feel empty.i really need to find someone that i can talk to..im really confused~ its stupid!i just dont what to do or how to feel.sometime i lyke being alone but it can be quite depressing..everyday i'll do the same things.watching tv,sleep,wake up,eat n just stay at home..im 14th i should hve fun but i just cant..idk why~? sometime if i go out alone,i feel kinda stupid n lame but i dont hve a friends that i can hang out with..why its so hard for me to fit in school or make friends?I HATE EVERYONE IN SCHOOL!!i got a phone but i dont really used it that much cos if i text my friends they never reply it,i dont why?NO WAIT!i know why!cos they're sucks!!!


17/march/2008


DEAR JOURNAL,


7TH APRIL 2008 i'll turn 14th,its my birthday..im not really that excited bout it..i know i'll never get anything from anyone..its just depressing..it makes me hate birthday n cake!on my birthday i'll start thinking bout all of the things,BAD THINGS that happen in my life n i'll get emotional..i feel like its not fair~ i know im not perfect,i know im diff..i dont hve friends that i can hang out with..IM DONE!NO ONE WILL UNDERSTAND ME!!I DONT LIKE SHARING MY PROBS WITH PEOPLE!!!SCREW YOU!



18/MARCH/2008
1:23AM


DEAR JOURNAL,


in my whole life,i never really feel HAPPY.i am happy but i was talking bout happy HAPPY,a diff type of happy example like really happy..since i was a kid,i always be a butt of a joke,people makin fun of me,they're bullied me,tease me n harassed me..even my family but not the harassed part,just the makin fun n bullied thingy but they're never goin to realize it that they're doing it but its okay,im cool~.They seen me happy,smile n laugh n stuff but its all an act,yeah!i was broken,i was crying n bleeding inside..im really frustrated with my life.i even thinking bout killing myself but if i do it,i dont get aything..hurmm..theres no one that can make me happy than myself..im used to it!




29/MAY/2008
12:34AM


DEAR JOURNAL,


why everybody hate me?everything i do is wrong.They dont know bout my pain thats gaining everyday n killing me every sec of my life..im sick n tired of people makin fun of me..they made me feel lyke im not human being,they treat me lyke im a ugly creature that has no feeling..its hurt so bad,they only way for me to feel better is to cut my hand..it help me calm down..why all of this shit happen to me?i really feel lyke i wanna kill myself but if i kill myself i dont get anything..i think that the world is better off without me.they all will be happy if im gone n vanish from da suface of the world..ARGHHHHHHH!!


30/may/2008


DEAR JOURNAL,


EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE IS A DISASTER!!!
FUCKKKKKKKK!!!


12/AUGUST/2008
11:11PM


DEAR JOURNAL,


my life is full with pain,people hate me.they treat me badly.they hate everything i do.they hate it when they see me happy.they will be happy when they see me in a lot of pain.they will be happy when they see me lying DEAD!i've got my own world,a world that full with pain and blood.there's no life in my world.there's only death soul crying n mourning for their death..reality never understand how i feel.im diff than the others..so they neglected me..they leave stranded n isolated in the world of darkness..if u really hate me,just said to my face!i can go far away from reality..n i'll never comeback..the world is better of without me..imma freak,a piece of shit that nobody cares about..im useless.stupid!dumb!fuck!!!




31/JULY/2008
 7:57PM


DEAR JOURNAL,


 Im not happy with my life!i dont know why im still breathing!??everything i do is always wrong!i wanna DIE!!im so frustrated bout these shit thats going on!my life is full with pain!nobody cares bout me!im going insane!they just dont want me to live!why dont u just killed me!!im not important to anyone!why i live a life like this?its full with hatred!im dying!everything will go wrong!my bro said he like it better if im dead!im so broken!ARGHHH!why i live like this?why everybody hates me?!why people always made me cry?i dont understand wht life is??!!


21/DECEMBER/2008
1:06AM


DEAR JOURNAL,


FUCK!i hate my life!why they do this to me?its not fair!i cant stand it anymore!im just freakin angry n hurts!my bro like it better if im dead?WHATS GOIN ON??!!FUCK!there's no one wants me to live!no one love me!no one care bout me!there's no reason for me to breath any longer in this world..nothin will change!i have to end all of this shit!its so painful!i cant stand it!i dont know what to do?im so confused!!






the story will be continue~

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